Before the baby is here, there is just the pregnancy. And when it’s your first pregnancy and you don’t really know what you are getting into, you realize quickly that there are some pros and cons to being pregnant. This is the list I have come up with so far:
You can’t sleep through the night.
You drink less or no coffee. Which is not helpful with the lack of sleep.
Your boobs hurt.
Your pants don’t fit. Your shirts look funny.
You feel fat.
You puke all day.
You feel nauseous even when not actively puking.
When you aren’t puking, you are starving and must eat immediately or the puking starts again.
You have to pee all the time. Even right after you just peed, you have to pee again.
Everything on the inside of you is moving, so you feel like you are getting stabbed all the time.
On occasion, you feel like you have been riding a bike for 9 days straight without a seat.
You can’t drink.
You can’t ride roller coasters.
You can’t ride jet skis.
You can’t eat sushi.
You can’t eat deli meat. I don’t even consider myself a deli meat fan necessarily but man, when you can’t have a turkey sandwich, you really want a big ass turkey sandwich.
You have no energy.
You can’t take medicine when you are sick.
Your steak must be cooked thoroughly.
When you are wearing maternity pants, you can pee faster because there’s no zipper, which works out since you have to pee every five seconds.
You can eat a lot of Girl Scout cookies and Sour Patch Kids and people don’t judge you too much.
You can lay around in pajamas a lot and not feel that bad about it.
You don’t have to change the cat litter. I don’t have a cat, but I assume that would be a pro.
That’s it so far.